Process to improve your self image!

 

Ever been nervous at a job interview? Have you thought of asking someone out, but then never did? Ever go to a fancy restaurant and try very hard to do everything right? And, then breathe a sigh of relief once you left the restaurant? Ever stop doing something you really wanted to do, because of what other people might think? Well, it’s because we a human beings are very conscious about what other people think about us. It’s called self image. The higher our self image, the better our lives will be and the reverse stands true as well.

 

So, what’s the solution? First step is to admit to ourselves that we need to develop our self-image. Nobody is perfect. Everybody needs to develop personally no matter where they are in life. If they don’t, they will either stay at the same level of happiness or slide down. The more we stay in denial, the worse our life gets.

 

Second step is to make three lists. First is a positive list of all the things that we are currently do that make us happy. Second is a negative list of all  the things that currently do that don’t make us happy. You know, the kind where you say, if I could get this (person, situation, etc.) out of my life, my life would be so much better. Third list is of all the things that would make us happy if we go to do them, but we don’t currently do.

 

Third step is to slowly stop doing the things on the second list and try to replace them with the things on the third list. Over a period of time, you will be doing a lot of things that you want to do in life. Doing this will create a feeling of happiness in us. And, when we feel happy, we attract success. Initially, we all start with minor successes. This in-turn wil also build our self-confidence.

 

Doing the first three steps on a regular basis guaranteed increases our self-confidence. Once our self confidence is high enough, we don’t think about what other people think of us. Increasing our self confidence increases our self image.

 

To fasten this process, it is important that we also read positive books for a few minutes every day, listen to positive talks and develop positive associations by hanging around people who support and encourage us.

 

The process I have listed here has tremendously helped me increase my self image over the course of last few years, and I believe it can do the same for you, if you apply it on a regular basis. If I can do it, so can you.

 

Respectfully,
Mayur Gudka

Who are you accountable to?

Stephen Covey says “Accountability breeds response-ability”. This is so true, especially in my case. Let me tell you a story.

I started a business couple years ago. But, nothing really came out of it for the first few years. This business was started on a part-time basis in addition to my full-time job. Objective of me starting this business was to eventually replace my full-time job, so I could control my own time and money. However, because I did not have to answer to anybody about my business activities or results, I did it when I felt like it. And, the result? Nothing to show for except loss for the first several years. Then one day, all of a sudden it hit me. (Well, I think it’s because of all the personal development books I have read over the years). I had to be accountable to somebody for my activities in the business. I had someone who I had been counseling with, but was never really accountable to him. So, starting Jan 2009, I sent him an “Activity Report” every Sunday night. What did this do? I had done more activity in the month of January 2009 for my business, than I had in the first 2 full years. The results were amazing.

So, who are you accountable to? It doesn’t have to be just in business. It could also be in your job. Matter of fact, I started sending an “Activity Report” to my boss at my job. I am actually getting more done at work as well. Still working the same hours, but now getting more accomplished. Boss is happy and knows I actually work and not just surf online.

It might be difficult at the beginning, but once you do it several times then it becomes very easy. At first, it gave me a very uneasing feeling like I had to report to Mr. XYZ but that really was not the case. He was actually able to tell me what areas I should focus more on to maximize my results.

If it worked for me, it has to work for you. There is absolutely no doubt about it.

Respectfully,
Mayur Gudka

The Slight Edge!

A dying, old, rich man called his two sons. He sat them down and explained that he was dying. He had 4 bags of money infront of him. Two of the bags contained 1 million dollars each. The other two bags contained a penny each. He then said, that he wished his sons to be successful in life. In order to provide them with a good start, he wanted to provide them money. He then put two bags in front of his older son; one with a million dollars in it and second with a penny. Then he explained that the son could either pick the million dollar bag and keep it or take the bag with a penny in it. If he choose the bag with the million dollars, he could take it and do whatever he wished. If he chose the bag with the penny, the rich man would keep the bag in the bank and have its contents double every day for the next 31 days.

The older son found the million dollar bag very tempting and took it hastily. The younger son was given the same choice. However, after some thought, he chose to pick the bag with a penny in it. (What would you choose? Why?). The older son laughed at it.

On the 1st day, the older son had 1 million dollars, the younger son had a penny. On the 2nd day, older son still had a million, younger son had 2 pennys. On the third day, the older son still had a million; younger son had 4 pennies. At the end of 31 days, the older son had a million dollars and the the younger son had a fortune worth $10,737,418.24.

Many times we decide to take on a certain activity and do it for a day or two or three, but don’t see any results. Then we decide, it is not working and we quit. But, if we continue it for a longer period of time, then we will see incredible results. Think about it. Have you been trying to lose weight or save money for some time? Did you try doing it but thought it doesn’t work and then quit it?

That’s the difference between the people who make it happen and those who don’t. The Slight Edge! The Slight Edge is doing simple things for a longer period of time and see the results compound. The Slight Edge creates phenomenal results. If you plan to exercise for 20 minutes a day, do it every day without fail. You might not see the results today, tomorrow, next week or next month. But, one year from now, you will be very fit. People will keep asking you for the secret of staying fit and all you have to tell them in reply is, “It is the Slight Edge! If I can do it, you can too.”

Hope this helped. Looking foward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur Gudka

Benefits of Disciplining Ourselves!

Discipline is an ancient secret of success. Many people are smart, skiiled, and very good at what they do. However, very few people see success. Why? I believe most people are not disciplined enough to consistently do something for a certain period of time. But, good thing is we can change. We can discipline ourselves. There are many benefits of disciplining ourselves.

Success comes from cultivating good success-oriented habits. But for most people their habits are what stops them from being successful. A lot of time I am accused by my wife that I do something for two days and then stop. So, I started monitoring myself. And, you know what? She was right. I would take action towards developing a new habit and after two days I would be back where I was. Matter of fact, it was very frustrating repeating the same mistakes over and over again. So, one fine day, while taking shower, it hit me. I did not know how to discipline myself. And, my quest began. I have changed many of my habits since then and am working to change a lot more. As a result of me disciplining myself, our relationship improved, our finances improved, and now we are on our way to financial and personal success.

In his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey says that if you do something for 21 days continously, you cultivate a habit. It works! Matter of fact, I highly recommened you get a copy of this book and read it and re-read it multiple times to absorb everything.

Reward yourself everytime you cultivate a new habit. It helps you stay on track. Keep a jar and put a dollar everytime you catching yourself doing a habit you want to get rid of. Give your kids a quarter everytime they catch you returning to a old non-productive habit. This technique will change your habit even faster because the kids will be following you waiting to make a mistake.

In conclusion … discipline yourself to become a better you. It helps in the long run.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur Gudka

Create a Mastermind Alliance!

If you have read Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich or The Master Keys to Riches, you will know the importance of creating a mastermind alliance. Basically, Masterminding (If that is a word!) is aligning yourself with an individual or a group of people from whom you can take advice on any subject you desire.

I have an mastermind alliance with an individual who is mentoring and guiding me in my business. If I run into a problem or need to do something in a better way, he is the first person I call. He will listen to me and then offer me his suggestions. Whether I follow these suggestions or not, it’s upto me. However I found out that when I don’t follow his suggestions it is my loss. So, I follow all of his suggestions. Similarly, you need to find somebody who can cover your blind spots. How do you find a mentor?

Your mentor should be or going towards in life where you want to be. He/She should be willing to guide you. If your mentor has a financial incentive in your success, even better. This way, they will never give you advice that will hurt you financially, because the more money you make the more money they make. It’s a win-win situation. If you know somebody who is in life where you are, talk to them. Ask them if they are willing to mentor you. If they agree, get excited. Respect them, their time and their advice.

I highly recommend you read the book Master Keys to Riches by Napoleon Hill. One of chapters in that book is entirely dedicated to creating a mastermind alliance. It surely will help you get a better understanding of this concept.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

A dollar saved is two dollars earned!

It really is … A dollar saved is almost two dollars earned. Think about it. If your employer gives you a grand two dollar bonus, how much do you actually get? About a dollar, because you have to pay income tax, social security tax, medicare tax, etc. So in reality, you only got a dollar increase.

There are several ways you can save your dollars.

• You can buy things for bargain. Rather than pay full price for an item, you can get new items for a lesser price. Shop at Walmart, Big Lots, Christmas Tree Shop, places where you get good stuff for a less price. I am not saying, become a total cheap freak. But, it helps you save some money.
• Don’t buy brand new cars. The moment you drive the car off the dealer’s lot, it’s price is reduced by several thousand dollars. Purchase a pre-owned vehicle.
• Don’t purchase luxuries on credit. Save for luxuries. If you pay for your big screen tv, vacation, stereo system, etc. in cash rather than take a loan, you will enjoy them much better. On top of that, you also save money on interest that you would pay otherwise.

Most people are good at saving money in the above mentioned ways. But, the difference between the rich and poor people is what you do with the savings. Poor people buy more things with the money they save. Things that don’t appreciate in value. Rich people save or invest the difference between full price and the price they pay for items they need.

Question is … What do you do with your savings? Do you invest it for future or do you spend it?

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Make budgeting work for you!

What? I’ve tried it many times. Doesn’t work. I just can’t stick to it. You need to be very disciplined to make it work. Budgets don’t work. It might work, I haven’t tried it yet – These are common reactions I get when I talk about budgeting to somebody. You know, it doesn’t have to be hard to tedious. Yes, budgeting needs a little bit of discipline, but it’s not hard as you think. A bit of planning, a bit of discipline and Walah! Budgeting becomes easy.

Most people simply budget for their needs. $1000 for rent, $300 for utilities, $300 for food, $150 for car payment, $100 for insurance, $200 for gas, and $300 for savings. This is how most people budget. But, remember we are humans. We have wants. If you are budgeting for a business, it is okay to budget only for needs. Businesses don’t have wants. But, people do. And, most people look at that extra $300 dollars at the end of the month and buy clothes, stereo systems, music cds, shoes, etc. and end up with zero or negative balance at the end of month. Then they wonder, I budgeted. I even followed it, It doesn’t work. I have no savings to show for it. But, they hadn’t budgeted for wants.

While budgeting, it is very important that we take our needs and wants into consideration. Out of $300 savings, take $100 and put it towards your wants. Plan early what you want, and budget accordingly. This way, you will have some money in your savings account.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Before Diving into the World of Investing

In his book Cashflow Quadrants, Robert Kiyosaki talks about 4 kinds of people - Employee, Self-Employed, Business Owners and Investors. While Employees and Self-Employed people form the left side of the quadrants, Business Owners and Investors form the right side of the quadrants. Point of this book is that it is okay to start your life on the left side of the quadrants, but make sure when your life ends, you are on the right side of the quadrants. Most people also desire to rich, so they make a dive – straight from employee or self-employed to investor. Bad Move!

Most people who have a comfortable job, start investing in real estate. Everything is hunky dory. They spot a good deal, seal the deal, start making monthly payments, and hope to sell the property when prices go high. Sweet! Then they get laid off from work. Trouble begins. Can’t pay the bills, money is stuck in their real-estate property. Can’t afford to make mortgage payments for real-estate property. I know what you are thinking, it won’t happen to me. So did a lot of other people whose houses are being foreclosed.

What does the Employee or Self-Employed person need to do? They need to create a supplemental income, a secondary income which they control. Not their boss. So, if something happens to their job, they can still afford to pay bills and make mortgage payments on the house. It takes worry off your head. You can still invest, but without much worries now. You don’t worry much if you lose money on the deal. Treat it like a learning experience. But, if all your money was stuck in investment and it turned out to be sour deal, you could have been in a depression.

So, look for a way to create a secondary source of income. Even if you don’t plan to invest, it will help you incase you lose a job. Always keep you eyes open for opportunities. There are plenty.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Your dominant thoughts drive your Life

Our lives are what we focus on. When I am driving somewhere in a hurry, I often pray, “Please don’t let there be any traffic, please don’t let there be any traffic.” And, then BOOM. There is traffic. I approach a traffic light and say, “I hope the light doesn’t turn red.” And, it turns red. Ever happen to you. It happens to me all the time. Whatever I focus on, put all my energy towards, happens. So, I have decided to put my focus and energy towards the things I want in life, rather than things I don’t want. I’ve decided to make my dreams my dominant thought process.

I would encourage you to take a pen and a piece of paper. Then, write down everything you want and desire in your life. Then take a deep breath. And, go down the list one-by-one asking the same question: “If I could have this right now, would I really take it?” If your answer is anything but an absolute Yes, cross it off and move on to the next item on the list. Go through all the items. At the end, you will have a list of items you truly want to accomplish in life. Next set priority levels to items that you want. Now, focus on things that are your top priorities, and think about them all the time.

How to make something your dominant thought?

There is no one set way to do it. It can be done in multiple ways. A very effective way is to create a Dream Book. Find pictures, write down descriptions, anything you can do to crystallize your vision of your dream. If you dream is a house, write down what kind of house do you want, how do you want the view to be from your front porch, what about the view from the back porch? What about the color of your house? How much property around the house do you want? Do you want it by the ocean, mountain, in the middle of a field? How many bedrooms and bathrooms? What kind of stairs do you want? How many garages? How long and wide should your driveway be? Should you neighbors be close to you or about 1/4 mile away? Crystallize your vision so much that you can literally see your house, everytime you close your eyes. And, put it all in your dream book. Look at the dream book a couple times a day.

Another way to do it, is write your goal & dreams on a index card and carry them in your wallet. Look at them a few times a day. You can also change your desktop’s wallpaper or screen saver to match your dream. Some people change their computer’s password also. Be creative, but make sure you look at your dream at least a couple times a day. The more you look at it, the more your vision will be crystallized.

When you make something a dominant thought of yours, the Universe has a way of changing events and circumstances around to help you bring your dream to life. Only thing is, you cannot give up on your dream. You must want it with all your heart.

Make your dreams your dominant thoughts. Don’t quit on your dreams. You will achieve them.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Develop an Attitude of Gratitude

What is Attitude of Gratitude?

Attitude of Gratitude is about being thankful for who you are and what you have. Some people are always happy and thankful for what they have. And, some are always grumpy and never happy with what they have. Somehow, most of the time everything that happens to them is also “Sour”, like themselves. Where as, people who have an attitude of gratitude, they experience good things most of the time.

How do you develop an Attitude of Gratitude?

Say “Thank You” as often as you can. If someone gives you money, thank them. If someone holds an elevator or a door for you, thank them. If you find a penny on the ground, thank god for putting money in your way. If someone gives you a gift or cooks a meal for you, thank them.

Oh, and remember don’t just thank them for the heck of it. Show sincerity in your words and actions while thanking them. Make a habit of thanking at least 10 people a day, until it becomes a habit. Once you cultivate this habit, it will do miracles in your life.

Why should you develop an Attitude of Gratitude?

When you give someone gratitude, it makes you feel good. When you feel good, your mind and heart are energized. When your mind and heart are energized, you create good thoughts, which motivate you to take action in a positive manner. When an action is taken in a positive manner with a purpose behind it, it will always become successful. Having an attitude of gratitude is a secret to success.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur