Process to improve your self image!

 

Ever been nervous at a job interview? Have you thought of asking someone out, but then never did? Ever go to a fancy restaurant and try very hard to do everything right? And, then breathe a sigh of relief once you left the restaurant? Ever stop doing something you really wanted to do, because of what other people might think? Well, it’s because we a human beings are very conscious about what other people think about us. It’s called self image. The higher our self image, the better our lives will be and the reverse stands true as well.

 

So, what’s the solution? First step is to admit to ourselves that we need to develop our self-image. Nobody is perfect. Everybody needs to develop personally no matter where they are in life. If they don’t, they will either stay at the same level of happiness or slide down. The more we stay in denial, the worse our life gets.

 

Second step is to make three lists. First is a positive list of all the things that we are currently do that make us happy. Second is a negative list of all  the things that currently do that don’t make us happy. You know, the kind where you say, if I could get this (person, situation, etc.) out of my life, my life would be so much better. Third list is of all the things that would make us happy if we go to do them, but we don’t currently do.

 

Third step is to slowly stop doing the things on the second list and try to replace them with the things on the third list. Over a period of time, you will be doing a lot of things that you want to do in life. Doing this will create a feeling of happiness in us. And, when we feel happy, we attract success. Initially, we all start with minor successes. This in-turn wil also build our self-confidence.

 

Doing the first three steps on a regular basis guaranteed increases our self-confidence. Once our self confidence is high enough, we don’t think about what other people think of us. Increasing our self confidence increases our self image.

 

To fasten this process, it is important that we also read positive books for a few minutes every day, listen to positive talks and develop positive associations by hanging around people who support and encourage us.

 

The process I have listed here has tremendously helped me increase my self image over the course of last few years, and I believe it can do the same for you, if you apply it on a regular basis. If I can do it, so can you.

 

Respectfully,
Mayur Gudka

The Slight Edge!

A dying, old, rich man called his two sons. He sat them down and explained that he was dying. He had 4 bags of money infront of him. Two of the bags contained 1 million dollars each. The other two bags contained a penny each. He then said, that he wished his sons to be successful in life. In order to provide them with a good start, he wanted to provide them money. He then put two bags in front of his older son; one with a million dollars in it and second with a penny. Then he explained that the son could either pick the million dollar bag and keep it or take the bag with a penny in it. If he choose the bag with the million dollars, he could take it and do whatever he wished. If he chose the bag with the penny, the rich man would keep the bag in the bank and have its contents double every day for the next 31 days.

The older son found the million dollar bag very tempting and took it hastily. The younger son was given the same choice. However, after some thought, he chose to pick the bag with a penny in it. (What would you choose? Why?). The older son laughed at it.

On the 1st day, the older son had 1 million dollars, the younger son had a penny. On the 2nd day, older son still had a million, younger son had 2 pennys. On the third day, the older son still had a million; younger son had 4 pennies. At the end of 31 days, the older son had a million dollars and the the younger son had a fortune worth $10,737,418.24.

Many times we decide to take on a certain activity and do it for a day or two or three, but don’t see any results. Then we decide, it is not working and we quit. But, if we continue it for a longer period of time, then we will see incredible results. Think about it. Have you been trying to lose weight or save money for some time? Did you try doing it but thought it doesn’t work and then quit it?

That’s the difference between the people who make it happen and those who don’t. The Slight Edge! The Slight Edge is doing simple things for a longer period of time and see the results compound. The Slight Edge creates phenomenal results. If you plan to exercise for 20 minutes a day, do it every day without fail. You might not see the results today, tomorrow, next week or next month. But, one year from now, you will be very fit. People will keep asking you for the secret of staying fit and all you have to tell them in reply is, “It is the Slight Edge! If I can do it, you can too.”

Hope this helped. Looking foward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur Gudka

Benefits of Disciplining Ourselves!

Discipline is an ancient secret of success. Many people are smart, skiiled, and very good at what they do. However, very few people see success. Why? I believe most people are not disciplined enough to consistently do something for a certain period of time. But, good thing is we can change. We can discipline ourselves. There are many benefits of disciplining ourselves.

Success comes from cultivating good success-oriented habits. But for most people their habits are what stops them from being successful. A lot of time I am accused by my wife that I do something for two days and then stop. So, I started monitoring myself. And, you know what? She was right. I would take action towards developing a new habit and after two days I would be back where I was. Matter of fact, it was very frustrating repeating the same mistakes over and over again. So, one fine day, while taking shower, it hit me. I did not know how to discipline myself. And, my quest began. I have changed many of my habits since then and am working to change a lot more. As a result of me disciplining myself, our relationship improved, our finances improved, and now we are on our way to financial and personal success.

In his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey says that if you do something for 21 days continously, you cultivate a habit. It works! Matter of fact, I highly recommened you get a copy of this book and read it and re-read it multiple times to absorb everything.

Reward yourself everytime you cultivate a new habit. It helps you stay on track. Keep a jar and put a dollar everytime you catching yourself doing a habit you want to get rid of. Give your kids a quarter everytime they catch you returning to a old non-productive habit. This technique will change your habit even faster because the kids will be following you waiting to make a mistake.

In conclusion … discipline yourself to become a better you. It helps in the long run.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur Gudka

Create a Mastermind Alliance!

If you have read Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich or The Master Keys to Riches, you will know the importance of creating a mastermind alliance. Basically, Masterminding (If that is a word!) is aligning yourself with an individual or a group of people from whom you can take advice on any subject you desire.

I have an mastermind alliance with an individual who is mentoring and guiding me in my business. If I run into a problem or need to do something in a better way, he is the first person I call. He will listen to me and then offer me his suggestions. Whether I follow these suggestions or not, it’s upto me. However I found out that when I don’t follow his suggestions it is my loss. So, I follow all of his suggestions. Similarly, you need to find somebody who can cover your blind spots. How do you find a mentor?

Your mentor should be or going towards in life where you want to be. He/She should be willing to guide you. If your mentor has a financial incentive in your success, even better. This way, they will never give you advice that will hurt you financially, because the more money you make the more money they make. It’s a win-win situation. If you know somebody who is in life where you are, talk to them. Ask them if they are willing to mentor you. If they agree, get excited. Respect them, their time and their advice.

I highly recommend you read the book Master Keys to Riches by Napoleon Hill. One of chapters in that book is entirely dedicated to creating a mastermind alliance. It surely will help you get a better understanding of this concept.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Your dominant thoughts drive your Life

Our lives are what we focus on. When I am driving somewhere in a hurry, I often pray, “Please don’t let there be any traffic, please don’t let there be any traffic.” And, then BOOM. There is traffic. I approach a traffic light and say, “I hope the light doesn’t turn red.” And, it turns red. Ever happen to you. It happens to me all the time. Whatever I focus on, put all my energy towards, happens. So, I have decided to put my focus and energy towards the things I want in life, rather than things I don’t want. I’ve decided to make my dreams my dominant thought process.

I would encourage you to take a pen and a piece of paper. Then, write down everything you want and desire in your life. Then take a deep breath. And, go down the list one-by-one asking the same question: “If I could have this right now, would I really take it?” If your answer is anything but an absolute Yes, cross it off and move on to the next item on the list. Go through all the items. At the end, you will have a list of items you truly want to accomplish in life. Next set priority levels to items that you want. Now, focus on things that are your top priorities, and think about them all the time.

How to make something your dominant thought?

There is no one set way to do it. It can be done in multiple ways. A very effective way is to create a Dream Book. Find pictures, write down descriptions, anything you can do to crystallize your vision of your dream. If you dream is a house, write down what kind of house do you want, how do you want the view to be from your front porch, what about the view from the back porch? What about the color of your house? How much property around the house do you want? Do you want it by the ocean, mountain, in the middle of a field? How many bedrooms and bathrooms? What kind of stairs do you want? How many garages? How long and wide should your driveway be? Should you neighbors be close to you or about 1/4 mile away? Crystallize your vision so much that you can literally see your house, everytime you close your eyes. And, put it all in your dream book. Look at the dream book a couple times a day.

Another way to do it, is write your goal & dreams on a index card and carry them in your wallet. Look at them a few times a day. You can also change your desktop’s wallpaper or screen saver to match your dream. Some people change their computer’s password also. Be creative, but make sure you look at your dream at least a couple times a day. The more you look at it, the more your vision will be crystallized.

When you make something a dominant thought of yours, the Universe has a way of changing events and circumstances around to help you bring your dream to life. Only thing is, you cannot give up on your dream. You must want it with all your heart.

Make your dreams your dominant thoughts. Don’t quit on your dreams. You will achieve them.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Develop an Attitude of Gratitude

What is Attitude of Gratitude?

Attitude of Gratitude is about being thankful for who you are and what you have. Some people are always happy and thankful for what they have. And, some are always grumpy and never happy with what they have. Somehow, most of the time everything that happens to them is also “Sour”, like themselves. Where as, people who have an attitude of gratitude, they experience good things most of the time.

How do you develop an Attitude of Gratitude?

Say “Thank You” as often as you can. If someone gives you money, thank them. If someone holds an elevator or a door for you, thank them. If you find a penny on the ground, thank god for putting money in your way. If someone gives you a gift or cooks a meal for you, thank them.

Oh, and remember don’t just thank them for the heck of it. Show sincerity in your words and actions while thanking them. Make a habit of thanking at least 10 people a day, until it becomes a habit. Once you cultivate this habit, it will do miracles in your life.

Why should you develop an Attitude of Gratitude?

When you give someone gratitude, it makes you feel good. When you feel good, your mind and heart are energized. When your mind and heart are energized, you create good thoughts, which motivate you to take action in a positive manner. When an action is taken in a positive manner with a purpose behind it, it will always become successful. Having an attitude of gratitude is a secret to success.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Dis-associate to Associate

Charlie “Tremendous” Jones says that five years from now, you will ahead, behind or stagnant in life depending on two things – kind of books you read and the people you associate with.

If you are not in life where you want to be, change your association. Otherwise, five years from today, everything will be the same in your life except, you will be five years older. Also, don’t associate with people who bring you down. Because, if you associate with such people on a regular basis, you will be in a worse situation than you currently are. So, how do you pick you association?

Look at people who are already in life where you want to be. Are they willing to help you get where they are? If your answer is yes, then these are the people you should be associating with. It will help you improve your mindset. They will challenge you to do better in life. They will guide you into the right path so you can also be as successful as they are.

You should also remember to not associate with the people who are going nowhere in life. Remember to dis-associate, so you can associate with people who have your interest at heart.

Figure out what you want in life. Find people who already the things you want in life. Lastly, figure out a way to associate with them.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

ABC’s for Success!

Last night, we got a poster called “To Achieve Your Dreams, remember your ABC’s”. I am making it a habit to read this poster every morning, so I remember what I need to do in order to succeed. It is so awesome, I had to share it with everybody and through this blog, I am glad I can do it. So, here it is … your ABC’s for Success!

• Avoid negative sources, people, places, things and habits
• Believe in yourself
• Consider things from every angle
• Don’t give up and don’t give in
• Enjoy life today, yesterday is gone
• Family and friends are hidden treasures, seek them out and enjoy their riches
• Give more than you planned to
• Hang on to your dreams
• Ignore those who try to discourage you
• Just do it
• Keep doing no matter how hard it seems, it will get easier
• Love yourself first and most
• Make it happen
• Never lie, cheat or steal, always strike a fair deal
• Open your eyes and see things as they really are
• Practice makes perfect
• Quitters never win and winners never quit
• Read, study and learn about everything important in your life
• Stop procrastinating
• Take control of your own destiny
• Understand yourself in order to better understand others
• Visualize it
• Want it more than anything
• Xcellerate your efforts
• You are unique of all God’s creations, nothing can replace you
• Zero in on your target and go for it

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

How do you ‘read’ failure?

I was recently reading a book called Beyond Positive Thinking written by Dr Arnold Fox, M.D. & Dr. Barry Fox, Ph. D. It is a phenomenal book. I highly recommend you own a copy of it. But, while reading this book, I came across a portion which shows how to read a failure. I mean, I knew that all success is based on failure. But, to understand failure and learn from it, you need to be able to read it to get the best out of it. What I am about to share with you is straight from the book Beyond Positive Thinking.

How do you read failure?

1. You’re giving up too soon.
2. You have the wrong approach
3. You’re doing the wrong thing
4. You have talents that have not yet been developed
5. You need a rest
6. You should examine your motives
7. You should remember that you’re only human

Think about the ventures or activites where you think you might have failed. What did you do? Did you eventually get success? If so, did you do any of the above mentioned things in order to get success? If not, could the end result have changed If you had read that failure in one of above ways?

Why not give it a try? If there is something that recently happened in your life that makes you feel like a failure, re-assess the situation using the above bulletted points. Maybe you can turn it into success.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur

Failure is not an option, it is a requirement!

What?
Are you stupid?
You out of your god-given mind?
That’s right. Failure is not an option. Winning is. But, why do you say it’s a requirement?

These are some of the reactions I got when I said this statement to some of the people you know. Maybe you had a similar reaction. But, failure truly is a requirement. If you want to be a success in life, you should be willing to fail. The opposite of success is not failure, it’s quitting.

All along school, we are punished for making mistakes. It is taught to us that failure is bad. We should always succeed. But, most people forget that the best way to learn something is by failing at it. For example, learning to walk – a kid falls numerous amounts of time before he falls down. A boy will fall many times off his bicycle before he learns how to ride it. All success is based on failure.

Thomas Alva Edison failed over a 1000 times before he perfected the incandescant light bulb. If he had quitted after a first few tries, we might not have a light bulb today. A person only fails when he or she decides to quit. But, as long as one is persistently working towards their goal, they are not failures. They just haven’t found success yet.

So go ahead and fail. Learn from every failure. Apply the lesson to get one step close to your success. After enough failure, you will get so close to success, that you will be able to smell it. Then fail one more time, learn one more lesson and there is it. Success is all yours. I did it. You can too.

Hope this helped. Looking forward to reading your comments.

Respectfully,
Mayur